this post might not make good sense

first off, i'm just so encouraged by the Lord and His Body right now.  it's so good that he gives us people to love, encourage, support each other.  and everything He does is good.

so a few weeks ago i had to surrender a few things to Him, one of which was my "mama instinct".  i had to surrender my intense longing to have kids and a family.  i'm not saying it's not going to happen, i'm just so in love with where i am with Him right now that if it doesn't happen, i'll be fine.  which is a huge step.

so last night at house church (which was hands down the best wed. night i've ever experienced.  worship was intimate, share time was encouraging, everything was just good) we were talking about identity.  after we were done, a group of people was brought to the front to pray with people they fell led to.  

i was not expecting to get prayer.  i've learned so much about identity in the past month or so that i didn't think there was more to learn.  i've been inundated with identity issues and i thought i had them all hashed out.  

so anyways, jordan  mitchell comes up to me and is like "i think i have a word for you but i'm not sure if it's for you."  so i told him i'd take that in mind and to tell me anyways.  he just said "homemaker."  

in my mind, i'm like "crap Lord!  i just surrendered this to You!  really?!!?"  but then he continues.  he says it's not homemaker in the housewife sense, but a Kingdom Homemaker.  

yeah, that word was absolutely for me.  he continued, saying that the Lord has placed me in a position where i am super observant of those around me (yes!) and i know what's going on in their hearts (yes again!).  

then he started praying that identity over me, that the Lord would give me new recipes and new food to feed to the hearts of His children since He tells me what they need.  amen!  that is me in two words.  Kingdom Homemaker.  i delight to walk in that.  

ps:  just an encouragement.  He's never done working in your life.  when you think He's gotten to everything, just remember that there is more than you can see.  so much more.

pps:  i am ALREADY a wife.  a wife of the best Husband ever.  He created marriage.  He's the best at it.  sisters, WALK IN THIS!  we're His daughters, but we're also His brides.  amen.